Failure to communicate

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

I'm not really proud of this, but I just, literally 5 minutes ago finished telling my dad about the surgery. Yes, the internet knew before he did. Yes, I probably should've called him a week and a half ago, er, two weeks ago, but I'm sorry, it's my dad and my boob and those two things just do not go together.

I explained to him what they were doing and the following conversation occurred:

Me: so yea, um, it's going to be on Tuesday.

Dad: Okay. How much are they going to be taking out?

Me: 1/4th of it (meaning 1/4th of my total breast tissue on that side).

Dad: Wow. Why only a 1/4th? Why not just take it all?

Me: ....what?...because, I mean, why would they take it all?

Dad: Well, if they know it's bad, why not just take it all out?

Me: Dad, it's my boob! They can't take it all out.

Dad: WHAT? I just meant the lump, take all of the lump out.

And that, among a host of other reasons, is why you just don't have boob conversations with your dad.

In other news, I just killed two cockroaches and burned the shit out of my finger. Oh Wednesdays...

(editor's note: Make that 4 cockroaches and counting. Please, someone shoot me.)


Anonymous said...

I'm sorry, was I not supposed to laugh at that conversation? Bahahahaha!!

Anonymous said...

Yeah, I am on the reverse side--talking to my dad about his prostate. Not fun. Sorry, boo.

kim-d said...

I find that, in many ways, not talking to my dad at all IS much better for my sanity. What with all of his ADHD-ness that he used to have. Now? Not sure.

And now, to horrify you a little further...can you imagine if the conversation was reversed and some guy (let's make it "some guy" rather than your dad...some things are just TOO horrible) told you they were going to remove 1/4 of his weiner and you suggested that they "just remove it ALL"????? Unless it's THEIR body part that is the subject, most times most men don't really get it. HAHAHAHA!

Ahhh, good times.

Wonderful World of Weiners said...

I heard roaches can live without their head...

Just something to think about!

Hallie :)

Overflowing Brain said...

Monk- no, you were surely supposed to laugh.

Nola- I'm pretty sure I did not say how sorry I am to hear about your Dad's diagnosis. I hope you'll look here so you can see it. I am so incredibly sorry.

Kim- can I say that you took awkward to a whole new level? Talking about my dad's wiener is not okay.

Hallie- Thanks for that jewel of information. So so appreciated.

kim-d said...

That is why it is just some guy and NOT your dad which, I pointed out, would be TOO horrible. Sorry. Awkward? Yeah, leave it to me to provide awkward-ness. Oopsies. My bad. Yup. sorry.


Anonymous said...

Okay, now Kim reminded me of my father saying something completely gross when he was getting married a few years ago. I'm sorry but I do not, want to know that things aren't ummm... as fast to happen when you get old. Way too much information. Not to mention he's with someone who is not my mother. Ugh!

My mother is probably looking down, laughing her ass off.

Flea said...

Okay. Tell me again why you live in cockroach central? I mean, New Orleans? It's the food, isn't it?