Oh the Irony

Thursday, February 7, 2008

(I promise this will be one of the two last MIL posts for a long time, then I have a Meme all lined up, and a couple of funny stories. This is just a good outlet for all of this right now, so bear with me a few more days and you will be rewarded with humor again. Unless you're into the crazy, in which case, the run is almost over...)

So the FIL spoke to the MIL about the dinner debacle. The MIL then spoke to the Fiance about it at the dinner they had last night (which I did not attend, I had class, though I'd sooner have dissected my own thigh than voluntarily gone to that dinner). In her version of the dinner story, not only did she eat the food I prepared, she had two servings of it. Now, she did have a few shrimp (that was only after she discovered that her left over meat was mostly fat and thus not enough for dinner), but she had no black beans and no rice and she is claiming two servings.

I may be a bitch, but at least I'm not a liar.

Additionally, I am now back in the time-out corner because yesterday morning when I left I didn't tell her "good morning." No, I'm serious, she's really upset about this. My reasons for not uttering those two words were many. a) I was running extremely late and literally running out the door and didn't have time for a conversation; b) it wasn't a good morning, what with her deciding to move out of our house because it wasn't nice enough for her; c) I was afraid I wouldn't be able to say it without the word fucking the middle.

And it wouldn't have mattered, she had already decided to move out before that, so it's not like I pushed her out, but in her universe what I did, the whole not saying good morning was "extremely rude," in fact more rude than not eating someone's cooking in their own home (by the way, I'm testing this theory next time I stay with them).

I can't wait to go to dinner with her tonight, that certainly won't be awkward.


brneyedgal967 said...

"I may be a bitch, but at least I'm not a liar."


I literally coughed, I laughed so hard. HILARIOUS! You should get that made into a shirt - and then wear it around her. Then sing the Carly Simon song...

"You're so vain, I bet you think this shirt is about you... you're so vain."


Thanks for the laugh.

Lanny said...

Yikes! Dinner tonight?
Good luck!

Anonymous said...

Oy my frigging vay. Maybe when you see her, you should say, "Good morning, infinity." Then you never need to say it again!

Anonymous said...


My lifeline is the message board on MIL Stories. You should check it out...you'll find lots of strategies there! I did!


Mental P Mama said...

Have a martini before you go.

Girl from Pennsylvania said...

My MIL was absolutely horrible up to and after our wedding. She made me feel like my husband had to choose between her and I. She made all events uncomfortable.

Then we moved 9 hours away.

The first time she came to see us, she went back to her hotel and called my SIL crying because we are so happy here.

I have talked to her perhaps once or twice since we moved here and seen her about four times. Things are so much better that way. I just let my husband deal with her and I basically ignore her.

Maybe she can move far far away?

Flea said...

Wait, didn't Edwin Edwards say something like that the last time he ran for governor of LA? It was "I may be a crook, but at least I'm not boring." Did I tell you that I grew up south of New Orleans?

kim-d said...

Okay, so apparently saying "borderline personality disorder" to a person who is exactly that is enough to send said sociopathic person over the edge. Have two drinks, meet her for dinner, make FULL eye contact and say loudly, clearly and concisely: "borderlineborderlineborderlineborderlineborderlineborderlinenarcissisticnarcissisticborderlineSOCIOPATH." Then, raise a glass in toast as she becomes a grease spot on the carpet.

Always here for ya, kiddo! I'm gonna rather miss these stories now that I know all is as it should be with the important players in this crazy game!