1. If there is any food you don't want to choke on, it's Flamin' Hot Cheetos.
2. If you were to consume Flamin' Hot Cheetos, you should wash your hands before taking your contacts out.
3. If you continue to buy and consume ENORMOUS quantities of Flamin' Hot Cheetos, you may not bitch about gaining 5 pounds.
4. Eating massive quantities of Flamin' Hot Cheetos, nearly choking to death on them and then burning out your corneas with the FHC dust will not help you get past the fear of having boob stitches put in (tomorrow, gah) while conscious.
Not even one little bit.
*(edited to add)
5. That my father is having a non-scheduled colonoscopy tomorrow to rule out non-gallbladder related issues and is having at least his gallbladder removed on Monday. The fact that they're insisting on doing the colonoscopy on such short notice makes me worry that I'm not getting all the facts.
6. That I'm a jerkface for obsessing about boob stitches. Nothing like a good heaping portion of reality and perspective to make you feel like an ass for whining about stitches.