Wednesday, August 13, 2008

I came across another fantastic CNN article with the headline, "The new '90210' not going to be 'cheese fest.'"

I'm sorry, it's like it was asking to be blogged about. First of all, bullshit. It is going to be the archetypal cheese fest. Never before in the history of the universe has there ever been a festival with more cheese. Ever.

"The spin-off on the fabled '90s teen drama premieres September 2 (8 p.m. EDT). If the show mimics the hot bodies, hip fashion and angst-ridden affluence of "Beverly Hills, 90210," it will also play edgier and less preachy, says co-executive producer Gabe Sachs."

EDGIER? LESS PREACHY? Less preachy than 90210? The show in which everyone besides Aaron Spelling's daughter slept with every one else, regardless of age or locations? The one where they talked about HIV in the 1990s? You're right. 10 years ago you showed that it was a-okay for teenagers to have sex and babies, it's definitely time to cut that preaching back a little. I think this go around we should show kids where to buy their cocaine and how to bust a hole in a condom to encourage teenage pregnancy. My mind boggles.

"To help spin the spin-off, original cast members Shannen Doherty, Jason Priestley and Jennie Garth will reprise their roles as special guest stars on "90210." Joe E. Tata will return as Peach Pit cafe owner Nat."

What CNN is really saying is that these four actors have otherwise been so out of work that this is the only job they can get. Shannen Doherty has either pissed off or quit every show she's been on, but I mean really, what are the chances she'll do that on 90210? What? She already did that the first time around on 90210? Ruh-roh. And Joe E. Tata, I'm sorry that at age 108 you still have to be associated with this show. I think it's time we let you rest in peace. Metaphorically, of course.

"But despite her announced participation, Tori Spelling (yet another star in the original series as well as daughter of the late TV mogul) isn't expected back."

Methinks it's perhaps because her father (RIP Aaron) is no longer producing and someone might realize that Tori Spelling is the worst actress on the face of the universe.

"The Wilson parents (Rob Estes and Lori Laughlin) seem hip and handsome in ways the Walsh parents (Carol Potter and James Eckhouse) were not."

Whoa, whoa, are you dissing Jim and Cindy? Not okay CNN, not okay.

"The "90210" formula will also include product placement 'as long as it doesn't hit you over the head," Sachs says. "I think it's important to show what kids really use.'"

So everyone will use a Mac, have an iPhone, drink Starbucks and wear Hollister clothes. I want to make a snarky comment, but having worked in the zip code 90210, that's actually not product placement, it's just being wealthy. Nevertheless, I'm sure they'll find a way to make it obtrusive. Come on, it's FOX The CW. They'll probably all work at the Apple Store or at Hollister or somewhere else hip. Wait, what am I thinking? Teenagers with jobs? On television? Sometimes I crack myself up.

I will betch and whine about this new show, but secretly it's because I know I'm too old to appreciate it. 90210 was my adolescence, though perhaps slightly more my husband's than mine. I just feel like somethings, like Joe E. Tata, are just better off left for dead.

(And if that last comment didn't land me a recliner in hell, I just don't know what will.)

p.s. blood test came back. Negative FTW!


Anonymous said...

I don't think I'll watch the new 90210 either. It feels to me like one of those over-hyped shows that won't survive its first season.

I do love "Tori and Dean" though. I think they create a lot of their own problems, but it's fun to see celebs screw up sometimes, too.

Anna in IL

Ness said...

I didn't watch the old 90210 so don't think I'll be watching this one either although my daughters are all hyped up about it. Glad you got your blood results back. Life goes on.

Lanny said...

I won't be watching it. I agree, some things just need to be left alone.

Glad you got the -! I know it must feel good to really know!

Anonymous said...

First, did you happen to see that Joe E. Tata made a cameo appearance in the steamy summer series, "Swingtown"? He was a real estate agent who sold a house to the main characters in the first episode. They did the closing on the steps of the house, and he got to watch the protagonists make out. I loved it.

Second, how disappointed was I that the "90210" spin-off was not focused on the priginal cast? I was so looking forward to following the gang into their 40s, lol.

Third, yeah, the old 90210 could get preachy. Not so much about sex. But there were many "Very Special Episodes." Remember the time Steve was accused of date rape (by the girl who ended up in the underwater research station on Lost)? Brandon befriending the homeless vet? Most of the socially aware episodes were in the high school years, when the sex wasn't quite as available to the kids as it was in college ;)

Daisy, Just Daisy said...

I didn't watch 90210. Somehow it never made it onto the english programming when I was in Europe & by the time we were back in the US, it was sort of "over".

Kirsten said...

I was a big 90210 fan. They graduated from high school the same year as I did. I don't think I will watch the new one though.

Great commentary on the CNN article. I always thought it was BS that Donna/Tori was the only one who didn't sleep around.

Flea said...

Y'know, I was having babies about the time the first one aired and it so didn't interest me, so I've never seen it. I can see that the spin off won't either. And it won't be something my 15 year old daughter watches. Thanks for the heads up!