We interrupt this blog for an important announcement

Saturday, July 26, 2008

I think some of you are onto me, or at least the big announcement I have. I alluded to it yesterday in my brain letter and probably could've been more subtle. So I'm just going to go ahead and say it.


In a little less than 9 months...


...drumroll....


I will still not have any children.

Do you people really think that after going 7 weeks without a period I wouldn't pee on every device that would tell me whether or not I was going to squeeze a small being out of my nether regions? Because I have, thrice. I had to convince my doctor not to make me do it a 4th time earlier this week. And if I was pregnant, do you think I'd be subtle about it? Hi, have we met?

So let me clarify. Not pregnant.

I love me some babies and strive to have several, but preferably not in this year in which we have no money, my husband is still in school and we share a house with two random strangers who do things like rinse forks off with water and then put them back in the silverwear drawer. See, I don't need to have children, I can pick up after other people and produce my own insomnia without ripping my taint to shreds. Yea, good luck getting that image out of your head.

Anyways, just wanted to clear the air. And now I'm going to go lobotomize myself because, seriously brain, what. the. hell.

10 comments:

Daisy Duke said...

I was waiting for this post...I almost gave you a hard time and then realized it really wasn't funny to a normal person, only to me, locked up with nothing but study materials.

Sigh.

And might I suggest using the tenant's toothbrush to scrub the inside of the toilet?

(I kid. I kid. Sort of.)

Lanny said...

My mother NEVER got a positive pregnancy test (other than a blood test), and I'm not even an only child.

Just sayin'

Actually, I know exactly what you mean. I was a teacher while Army was in med school too. Gourmet was pb&j!

KT said...

Just found your blog. Love it.

Monkling said...

I say it's nothing that a nice chocolate thick shake float can't cure. Well not the baby part.

Flea said...

Mmm. Chocolate shake.

kim-d said...

Mmmmm. Anything chocolate.

Darn. I thought I was onto something. And also because, if I was, teasing in a very loving manner would abound. Darn.

Ya know, sometimes life happens when we are busy doing other stuff. Just sayin'.

Ness said...

Big hugs, Katie.

Just big hugs for you with one exception that I, too, never made a pee test come up positive and all 3 of my kids only came up positive when they did the internal exam and heard a heartbeat. And the pregnancies always came at the worst of times financially. But 30 years later we're doing OK with the 21, 23 and 30 year old. Take care and hope the brain takes the deal you've struck with it.

lace1070 said...

My two cents ~ if you want it ~ my body goes nutty every summer and I am always conviced I am pregnant agin. Just so rude to mess with our minds that way, don't you think? On the other hand, with my first child Hannah, I failed three pee tests only to find out I was pregnant a month later. So ~ I am sure that makes u feel a whole lot better, right? Blame the brain tail. Hugs ` Lace

Katie said...

Y'all are NOT helping with these stories. Not helping one little teeny tiny bit.

Daisy Duke said...

Saw your twitter comment about the GRE. Let me just say: I took a practice LSAT the night before the exam and got the equivalent of "Thanks for spelling your name wrong. We award you no points & may God have mercy on your soul."

On the real thing? Killed it.

Seriously. Don't take the practice stuff to heart.