Mardi Gras Madness: Weekend Update

Sunday, February 3, 2008

Sorry for the delay. No, I've neither killed myself, nor the MIL, though there have been a few close calls on both sides. There is a lot to share, to I'm going to do my best to compress it down into a manageable length.

Work as usual (kind of, it was a super short weird day), then PT, then a Tetanus shot. Out of curiosity, why on earth does my doctor need to know when my last period was to give me a shot? And then, because I was running a little late to the doctor and I had to quickly put money in the meter, I put in a quarter and a nickel instead of two quarters and consequently, when I got back to my car, the parking attendant was standing there, printing out my God-forsaken ticket. TWO MINUTES LATE. Seriously.

The parades that night were okay, the people were big gigantic assholes. Asshole number one told me that I couldn't set up my chair next to his ladder because if I fell down (what, does he know me?) that then I'd hit his ladder or his wagon that was three feet away. We suggested that he move his wagon over so that other people could enjoy the space too and we got the ever popular lecture about how they had been there since 3pm and yadda yadda yadda, so would I, but I was too busy getting a shot and a parking ticket. He also suggested that I set up the chair in front of his kids' ladders, but I declined because I'm not that kind of asshole.

Asshole number 2 was a very large man who got upset when we moved (not by my choice) and we were encroaching on his chair. Not near his chair, by the way, but getting close to where we might be near it eventually. His method of dealing with this was to push me into the moving floats so that I almost got run over several times. It was awesome. Especially when we found out that he was a woman. A woman that so was going to kick my ass.

The MIL wanted to go to the French Quarter and because it is her "stomping ground" and her "home base" and she wanted to be there. So we agreed to go see the morning parades there after a lunch at The Palace Cafe. After the parades The Fiance and I were going to go to the Medical School campus and get some work done before snagging a spot for Endymion. Oh were we naive. The first flaw was that the morning parades take a good two hours to get to downtown, so the second one (Tucks, where we got a crap-load of stuff) ended and we had like maybe an hour to kill.

In that time I saw not one, but two people urinating in a parking lot, one of which was a woman, and yet I somehow managed to get myself to a public restroom at Harrah's without any ordeal. Drunk people are especially stupid. Anyway, we decided to meet up with the MIL and go get a spot for Endymion. Turns out so did everyone else. We ended up in a spot bordering a police barricade, which was good and bad, as there was not really anyone in front of us, but also, every drunk moron seemed magnetically forced to go into that area and then be thrown out of it, right in our laps. On the upside, we did get to see several people arrested, and one guy climb up a palm tree to see better and just as he got maybe 20 feet up and the cops came to get him down he lost his footing and slid, stomach to the tree trunk, all the way down. That, and a story I'll tell you tomorrow, will got down in history of great moments.

We ended up staying through float number 9 because it was well after 8 before the parade even got to us (it began at 4 something) and I was dying. Dying because I woke up with The Death Saturday morning and after being on my feet for 8 hours, I was just done done done. It was a really cool parade, but I felt like ass. The MIL left hours before (but not without telling us 800 times that it "had better be worth it.") and we met her for the longest dinner in the history of mankind, where I almost fell asleep in my own food 12 different times.

I woke up feeling even worse today, the Death has firmly settled in my sinuses and chest. Oh and throat, wouldn't want to leave that out. Had a mild fever in the morning, but we carried on anyway. We walked over a mile to where The Fiance's school was set up and hung out there. I made it through about 2 of the 4 parades before I had to go home. When I got home I found my fever to be 103 degrees and well, needless to say, it wasn't pretty or fun. But it's down to about 99.7 now, which is a blessing, and is a side effect of taking a boat-load of Aleve. I stayed in bed and did my physics homework and blew my nose 1400 times. It was awesome.

The Fiance and the MIL got back at like 4:30, unpleasantries ensued and eventually The Fiance and I headed back out for Bacchus. It ended up being a lot of fun, especially it being just the two of us. I still feel like a big ole pile of crap and as it stands I can't go to bed anytime soon because we're now watching the dvr'ed superbowl, even though I know the winner. And while I fear the reaction my so lovely, but terrible winner of a Fiance will have when he finds out his team wins the game, I'm still happy for the Giants. I was really ambivalent about the game, but I have to say, I'm quite happy to see that the Patriots didn't get the perfect season. Nothing personal, I just hate the Patriots.

So that's mostly it. I was supposed to go hang out with NOLA tomorrow during the parades, but considering that I'm pretty sure I'm contagious and she has a small child, I really can't imagine how that would be okay at all. I'm so disastrously sad about it, but there's really not much I can do. If I wake up feeling perfect and go all day sans-fever maybe I'll reconsider, but I'd hate to spread this around more than it needs to be. So tomorrow is rest, two parades at night and then more rest. And maybe some work, with a side of rest.

Countdown until she's gone: 4 days, 20 hours, 52 minutes.


Anonymous said...

WOW!! You do a whole lot more when you feel bad than what I do when I feel But in my defense, I do not like parades.. or well parades with a large crowds of people. And especially large crowds of DRUNK people. Not sure if I could hang in there for all that. Anyways, hope you are feeling better tomorrow!! Everybody in my house has the flu, so we'll be in bed all day....YAY!!!!

Anonymous said...

Hope you feel better soon. Probably will when fMIL leaves!! I am sorry that we (probably) won't meet tomorrow, but I TOTALLY understand. Coffee soon for sure!!

Love the countdown you've got going!!

kim-d said...

HAHAHA--LOVING the countdown. Actually, LOVING this whole post--well, not about you and The Death. I'm sad about that, but I just have to tell you this. For over two years now I've been "reading" you and thinking you're the bee's knees. But since this whole blogging thing? I just love ya even more, with every post you make and every comment you leave for me. WITTY? Man, that doesn't even begin to cover it. You are so damn funny I can't even stand it, and I'm glad we're friends. But I still wish that, due to your bad eyesight, you would smack the MIL a good one in the kisser. HAHAHA! How did such an awesome Fiance spring from....well, I won't go there. In fact, enough of the MIL. You know how she upsets me (on your behalf)...HAHAHA! That being said, I'd still LOVE to hear how The French Quarter came to be her stomping grounds and such???? Hmmmm...I don't know, it just doesn't seem to add up. I still have lots and lots to say, and questions about Mardi Gras and parades and such--AND A WEEK OFF???--but this is already a book. So, next time. Get well, Sweetie!

Wonderful World of Weiners said...

The countdown rocks!! I love me a good countdown!

And you're right, the Giants will never win again!!! (who am I kidding...anything is possible now that the Pats lost) sigh...