Thursday, May 24, 2007

One of the cool things we did on my 24th birthday was go to "Rock and Bowl." It's an older bowling alley that's made special by the fact that they have live bands play each night. It's one of the New Orleans "institutions" that we'd always heard about but never had the occasion (read: the money) to go. They have a country night, a zydeco night, and so on, always a little different. It's a pretty cool place, the gigantic bar certainly doesn't hurt. On my birthday we had a reservation for 10pm for a lane, which was great because it was precisely when the band, Bonerama (obviously one of our favorites...), was set to play.

We got there at 9:50, as told and were forced to choke down a 10 buck a piece cover charge. For BONERAMA. Then we went to set up our lane. Well, the place is done by the hour, so we had to wait until 10:10 when she shut the lanes down and we'd be able to bowl at 10:15. Also, we couldn't get shoes because they were all rented out, so we had to wait. For warm shoes. Warm public shoes. I think I just threw up a little bit thinking about it. But we paid our lane and shoe fees and then waited to bowl.

Our lane was eventually free and we got started. We bowled like 2 frames when the woman 2 lanes over from us came looking for bowling our ball corral. Really. So I went up to her because I was particularly annoyed by this (and because I had the lightest ball and I didn't want her to take it) and informed her. The exchange went something like this:

Me: "Excuse me, what are you doing?"
Her: "Looking for a ball (a "duh" was implied in the tone here), we don't have any"
Me: "Um, yes, but these are our balls"
Her: (with excessive attitude) "What, you brought all your balls from home?"
Me: silence in awe of the amazing attitude and stupidity in light of the fact that there were 8 trillion other bowling balls in the racks behind us but that our corral was the only place she could manage to track down a ball. And I think a mumbled out an "of course we didn't bring them from home, but that doesn't mean you can walk up and take them."

Her daughter then pointed out the huge racks of balls behind us and she went back to spreading absurdity elsewhere.

The highlight of the evening though was my step-dad's bowling ball. Being that it was the heaviest, it wouldn't ever make it back into our ball corral thing. It would get all the way there, and then fall and roll all the way back down the alley, so he had to catch it each time, and he often forgot and then there was much standing around and waiting while it CRAWLED back down the chute. And then he was so afraid the woman was going to take it, he held it in his lap until his next turn. It was like he had a pet bowling ball. There are pictures, they are great.

And Bonerama? Surprisingly entertaining and surprisingly was a brass band of relatively older men, not a punk band of 14 year olds who laugh everytime you say their band name.


kim-d said...

Because I have the mind of a rather deranged 14-year-old, I laugh everytime I read, see, or even think about BONERAMA..hehehe! And, seriously Katie, women with Tiffany engagement rings just do not go around getting in bowling-alley brawls...just give up the balls. HA! Told you...deranged 14 yo! Although the visual of your stepdad and his pet bowling ball is hilarious. A few weeks ago, I went "Cosmic Bowling" with my son, DIL, daughter, SIL and a bunch of their friends--and had a complete blast! And I didn't even bowl, but I did ensure that everybody got cheered for. And people kept handing me beverages that I didn't pay for. Which, when paid for by someone else, much like food, taste much better. It was so much fun, BUT nobody tried to grab anybody else's balls. Okay, I'm just going now.

Overflowing Brain said...

Oh Kim, you just made me laugh out loud. I didn't even realize how many dirty joke opportunities a bowling story with the word bonerama in it provides. I mean, I kinda did, but you're taking it to a whole new level.

kim-d said...

Katie, you just gave me the most supreme compliment, in my book. If I made you LOL, then life is good for me. Yeah, given even HALF an opportunity, I can...and will...take dirty and double entendre to levels a lot of people don't even know exist. I just can't help it, my mind naturally goes there...but not in a totally gross way or anything. HAHAHA!

And to you...I must give you a huge "THANK YOU" forevermore. For giving me "BONERAMA." You can count on it that I will get A LOT of mileage out of that one!

Love ya, girl! Have a great weekend!